buffy the vampire slayer once more with feelings

Two vampires and a demon admit in response, “She does pretty well with fiends from hell, but lately we can tell that she’s just going through the motions, faking it somehow.” Nothing seems to penetrate my heart,” she laments. “I’ve been going through the motions, walking through the part. She’s far less inspired these days to save the world, and even the cold dead ones trailing behind have picked up on this cosmic shift. Buffy has recently been resurrected from the bowels of Hell, thanks to Willow ( Alyson Hannigan) using magic, and finds herself with the opening song “Overture / Going Through the Motions” feeling listless and lethargic about her life. With music and lyrics entirely written/composed by show creator/director Joss Whedon, who has recently been accused of on-set abuse, “Once More, with Feeling” depicts the haunting of a musical demon, who forces the townsfolk of Sunnydale to spontaneously break into song. It’s not hyperbolic to say that I owe her everything for changing my life. A few days later, Allison invited me over to her place to witness the episode for myself. I’d never heard such rhapsody obviously, I followed the sound of her voice, soon to discover what would become a defining moment of my young adulthood. I can see it all now: Allison toiling away on a piece of fabric on the sewing machine while harmonizing with “I’ll Never Tell,” her voice carrying all the way up the stairwell to the theatre lobby. If memory serves, it all started when Allison, the costume shop manager and designer, belted along to the soundtrack playing through the company CD boombox. I remember the experience like it was yesterday and how they gushed unapologetically about the show and this must-see musical bonanza. In the summer of 2004, I worked as an intern for a local stage theatre company and befriended resident Buffy stans Allison and Alan, two good friends still to this day. I knew I was in for quite a ride, but I never expected such thrilling musical compositions befitting a high-budget Broadway show. Those words, that performance, Gellar’s command onscreen sent a shiver down my spine. “I just wanna be alive!” Buffy bellows, as she wanders aimlessly through a fog-imbued cemetery, knocking off various dead things. Picture this: a wide-eyed, very green, and totally “straight” 18-year-old witnessing the sweeping, orchestra-driven opening number and being transformed as one is after a baptism.

So, imagine my wonderment in beholding “Once More, with Feeling” for the very first time. I grew up transfixed by such landmark cinematic feats as The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Little Shop of Horrors, and The Wizard of Oz, as well as Broadway productions like Into the Woods and Rent. Twenty years later, it remains one of the greatest episodes of television and musicals ever created. More than any other episode, it’s the much-lauded “ Once More, with Feeling,” a musical extravaganza bursting with heart-pounding choruses and aw-shucks quirk, that I hold most dear. I have, of course, come around to the show since, and its fantastical storytelling holds a special place in my ghoulish, cold heart. During the show’s run (1997-2003), I tuned it on occasion, finding great delight in Sarah Michelle Gellar’s wonderfully empowering turn as the titular vampire hunter, but it was never an obsession among my core group of friends. I admit: I was only a casual Buffy the Vampire Slayer viewer.

Buffy the vampire slayer once more with feelings